Jack told me to talk dirty to him.

So I lowered my voice, channeled my inner virgin slut and said:

"Poop."

…

Jack heard me.

He was twitching before but after that, he stopped twitching as well.

"Pal," He spoke, his face flat. "Are you trying to make me hard or steal my will to never get hard again."

"I am trying, alright. I am not a professional dirty talker. I said the first dirty thing that came to my mind."

"Say something else. Say something you want your girl to say to you in the bedroom. Imagine it."

"Something that I would want to hear from my girl… I see. Alright. I got it. Get ready."

Jack nodded.

I cracked my fist like I was going to end world hunger and said:

"Oh Racis~ Your dick is better than your dad's!"

"Da fuck?"

"Da fuck?"

Jack and Johnson both blurted a curse as if I said something forbidden. Like I called a fat woman sexy. They stared at me with the eyes that said, Did I hear that right?

I was just about to ask what was wrong before Jack spoke himself.

"Why do you want your girl to say something like that?!"

"Yeah." Johnson chimed. "Why would she mention your dad in the bedroom with you?"

"Alright. First of all," I turned to Jack. "Why are you so shocked about this? You are the same person who told me to get hard imagining my sworn sister. Nothing should bother you at this point."

"This and that are two different things, pal."

"How?"

Jack rolled his eyes. "Why would your girl compare your stick to your dad's? Heck, how does she know that you are bigger than your dad? What kind of girl do you want to sleep with who knows the size of your dad? Do you perhaps have…" Jack squinted his eyes. "A step mother fantasy?!"

He stared at me with a judgemental gaze. The kind the Onlyfans girls give men who say their body count is in double digits.

"Answer me, pal. Do you have a step mother fantasy? Yes or no!?"

"Yesn't."

…

"You dare use my own spells against me?" Jack glared like an angry chicken staring at a kfc store.

I sighed. "Look man, I know what I said was weird. And I probably said it because I have watched too much porn. I just remembered a video and said what the actress said to the actor during the scene."

"Don't lie. I clearly asked you to say what you wanted your girl to say to you while you made love to her."

"Yes. But that's because my mind is filled with filth. You can't blame me for that. Also, I thought you would like such things. And judging by the girls of this world, I am convinced that whoever I end up with in future would certainly have seen my dad's and many other men's sticks!"

"Fine. I believe you. But this time try to do something else. I am literally standing here in full display because of your miserable attempts at talking dirty."

"Yes. Yes. This time I would really do it."

Jack crossed his fingers as if I was going to do something that could change the world.

Nevertheless, I channeled my inner slut again, this time with a touch of videos found in the deepest corner of ponr hub.

I considered everything Jack had said and showed to me over the period of time. I recalled his tastes, his fetishes and like an educated whore, I did a customized, requested and scientific dirty talk to him.

"Two penguins are coming towards you, Jack. And you are surrounded with muscular, oiled black men. The penguins are looking at you with intensity. Their small wings and beaks are flapping because they want to smack your buns. They… they…"

"Yes, pal. They what? What did they do? They what!?"

"They dropped your pants and shoved their beaks in your ass!"

"Aaahhhhhh!!"

"Yess!"

[ WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU DOING!? ]

"No way! I don't believe this!"

Many things happened at once.

Jack let out a passionate moan.

I let out a victory moan.

The system let out a ridiculed moan.

And lastly, Johnson let out a disbelief moan.

Amidst all these moans, I focused on the main moans.

[ I didn't moan! I am just shocked at your indifference about you burning right now. Instead of focusing on that, you are giving a forbidden roleplay TED talk meant for beastality lovers to a ghost and heck why does your dirty talk include penguins!? I want to drown myself in holy water just by thinking that I stay inside your mind! And why the hell are you only in this corridor for the past ten thousand words!? Do something. Move the story forward. Just. Do. Something!! ]

Like I said, I focused on the main moans—Johnson's and Jack's.

[ I swear, I would give up everything just to grow hands so that I could slap your cheeks till you stop liking it. ]

'Till I stop liking it? Why would I even like the slaps in the first place?'

[ Because I was talking about slapping your other cheeks. ]

'Oh. Makes sense. Now shut up. Let me win this case first.'

The system instantly went silent but I think I heard some kind of angry noises. He must have remembered his ex. Anyway…

"See, Johnson? This is what happened to you when you saw those naked women. This is normal. This is nature's way of saying it's time to mate. This phenomenon is called a boner and what your father told you about it that it is a myth, is absolutely wrong. Boner is not a myth. If anything, Women reaching orgasm is a myth."

I explained Johnson as clearly as a hair visible on a mobile screen and now that I see myself, I have become a biology teacher in another world and in its prison of all places. I just single handedly destroyed the template of the reincarnation genre. Beat that, Nolan.

Johnson listened to my words while staring at the live proof that I showed using Jack. His lips trembled.

"I can't believe this. This is impossible. My father told me this never happens. This only exists in fiction!"

"... Dude, you have horns and orange skin on your face. You exist in fiction. Not this."

"Then what I felt with those naked women…"

Johnson raised his hands and slapped them on his forehead.

"Was not me turning to stone?!"

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